In Chinese tradition, when gathered around the circular dining table, you never flip a steamed fish.
My father doesn’t follow traditions as religiously as generations before him. But some traditions, possibly ones that are integrated in every day rituals, do stay.
If I am not mistaken, we learned about this food tradition when we were at my grandmother’s house having dinner one weekend. About once a month growing up, we would go to my MaMa’s house for a home-cooked meal. She would always make our favorite – steamed tofu with mushrooms, Chinese faat choi (black, thin, hair-like noodles) that represented prosperity, a meat dish, possibly steamed egg, and always a steamed fish.
It was during these meals that I learned to appreciate how to eat the fish cheek – one of the most tender parts of the fish. At first my family would always save the cheeks for me, but as my sister caught on, I had to share them with her. Also, when eating fish, I learned that the sauce that the fish is in is excellent with rice. I would eat entire bowls of rice with that fish sauce – a combination of light soy sauce, sesame oil and the vegetables used to cook it. Thirdly, it was during these meals that I discovered my love for fish skin – the slipper kind when it’s steamed since is so full of flavor. I also learned how to maneuver meat and other bulky foods in my mouth such that I could use my tongue to take out the bones and spit them out onto my napkin. It’s quite an art.
Yet, the most intriguing memory I have about fish came from my dad one day when he told me about how his mom had taught him that you cannot flip a fish. In Chinese culture, a fish represents a boat. If you flip the boat, you lose all of the contents of it. The Chinese word for fish sounds like a word that represents wealth or fortune. The word ‘yu’ describes having leftovers or an abundance of goods, and it’s always a good year if you’re living in surplus. As such, the reason why Chinese people don’t flip the fish is because then you are metaphorically capsizing your abundance into the water.
Though my dad isn’t very superstitious, and neither are my sister and I, to this very day we don’t ever flip the fish… and I don’t think we ever will!
Memories from the branches of Fowler and Wong 